Loving your story through rejection

 

Hi all. So I’ve been querying for quite some time, and safe to say, it is not going well. I had one spark of optimism during PitMad when my dream agent liked my pitch… yeah, that didn’t go anywhere.

But I’m not going to lie, querying has been this long roller coaster of dread, doubt and despair. Yay, alliteration.

As the rejections keep piling up, it gets harder and harder to stay motivated to keep chasing this dream, or to even think that I’m even worth achieving the dream. Cue tears. So I’m trying desperately to keep writing, keep pushing forward, and most importantly, keep loving my stories.

Because here’s the thing: If you don’t love your stories, who else will? GUARDED (the book I’m querying) means the world to me. Writing that story made me feel like my PTSD had a purpose, like there was a reason I went through that trauma. The MC Kjersten took on my MH struggles and was able to learn how to cope with them to create meaningful relationships with people, something I can only dream of one day being able to accomplish.

Somewhere along the lines, I’d forgotten these things because the rejections convinced me that the story was worthless, which in a roundabout way, meant that my trauma was meaningless, which of course lead down a deep, dark rabbit hole of awful. Woo!

Luckily, I have a brilliant friend who entertains my rants regarding what the industry deems “sellable.” Because that’s legitimately what publishing comes down to. You could do everything right. You could go to the conferences, take the webinars, take part in critique groups, enlist beta readers, and revise, revise, revise. But at the end of it, if whomever you’re querying doesn’t believe your story is sellable, it’s a rejection. Plain and effin simple.

That’s not a reflection on your writing or your story. And as difficult as it is to accept that – because believe me, I know that struggle – you can’t let those rejections tarnish your love for that story or how important that story is to you.

Wishing you the best,
B

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Don’t Be a Jerk. It doesn’t actually get you anywhere.

This is definitely a rant-based post, so stop reading this now if you fall into the category of jerkism.

So if you’re new to my blog, welcome. Usually I like to discuss the different aspects of writing because I am a nerd and to me, writing is a pretty awesome way to spend one’s free time. (Also, I’m a workaholic. I have accepted this and am not currently looking to change this character flaw.) But this week, I’m choosing to rant about an irritating issue: jerkism.

Jerkism (a word I’m making up for the sake of this post) refers to the people who lack sympathy and manners to properly conduct themselves in a professional way with their colleagues and potential business partners.

Here’s the thing, I get that you’ve poured hours upon hours of your life into your project. But here’s a hard truth, art is subjective and everyone is entitled to his or her opinions. If you’re not ready to submit yourself or your work to criticism, then you shouldn’t submit, period.

Agents, publishers, editors and critique partners are all people with their own lives and their own deadlines. You are not entitled to their undivided attention and should not expect to be their number one priority at the drop of a hat. Sure, the wait is frustrating and anxiety-inducing, but you can’t expect the world to revolve around you (because the sun has a MUCH greater gravitational pull – just saying, perspective).

In recent weeks, I’ve seen SO MANY tweets from agents about fellow writers who feel entitled to their time/services. STOP IT! As wonderful as I’m sure your WIP is, it’s not going to be an agent’s top priority. So if you’re querying, be patient, be kind, be gracious. If not for the sake of being a decent human being, at least for the sake of professionalism. No one wants to work with a jerk by choice – common sense, people!

I feel your pain, I do. I’m currently preparing my MS and query for submission, but please, fellow writers, treat the industry with respect. I sympathize with your frustration and the gut-wrenching awfulness that is rejection, but trust me when I say being a jerk doesn’t actually get you anywhere.

So write on, wonderful writers! If it’s any consolation, I’m rooting for you.